E-couragement: 3 Steps to Make Friends with Change

"Everything can be taken away from a man but one thing; the last of human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way." Victor E. Frankl It happens every year. 2015 will be no different. I’ll receive several calls/emails from clients who are no longer employed. We'll meet for coffee and chat about their circumstance. It's an honor to share this journey with them. In general, change makes us uncomfortable, uneasy and even afraid. Since change is an inherent part of our human experience, what if we could transform our relationship with it? Let’s consider 3 steps that could shift change from an adversary to a friend:

1. Be Kind to Yourself: Before takeoff, the flight attendant declares, “If cabin pressure should change, panels above your seat will open revealing oxygen masks; reach up and pull the mask towards you… Secure your own mask before helping others.” Did you hear it? You have permission to take care of yourself first. At 30,000 feet that makes sense. Yet at sea level many of my clients are blue-in-the-face having spent most of their energy providing oxygen for others. Here are a few ways to be kind to yourself in the midst of a change experience:

• Acknowledge and validate your feelings: Angry. Scared. Excited. Simply feel it. Be patient. Talk about it. Support yourself.
• Treat yourself: Vacation. Massage. Pedicure.
• Carve out time for inspiring activities: Hobby. Music. Read.
• Spend more time with people who are good to you.

2. Be True to Yourself: Reconnect with your core values. During times of change, be clear where you won’t compromise. Recently, the workplace of a client was closing. His successful operation was being shut down by a corporate mandate. Friends questioned him during the final months. They asked, “Why are you working so hard? Why do you still care?” He replied, “Because that’s who I am. I work hard. I care. These current circumstances won’t change that.” He remained true to himself in the midst of significant change.

3. Be Open to Opportunities: As time progresses, I’ll hear back from clients on their change journey. They’ll tell me about the exciting opportunities that have appeared. They often find themselves reinvigorated and excited about their new path. Whatever change shows up in your life, expected or unexpected, be sure to remain open to the good that will surely come your way.

Every year my business and life change in common ways. Some years, like in 2002 when I got fired and 2012 when my wife died, it was more significant. Whatever level of change you experience this year, apply these 3 steps and allow it to morph into your friend.   

Leave your comments: How have you successfully navigated change in the past?