E-couragment: In Pursuit of Happiness

August 2009 I had just completed delivering an intense two days of learning for 24 superb leaders in Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic (I know…this is tough work).

After a quick workout, it was time to enjoy some Caribbean food, one El Presidente beer, and interesting conversation with some managers/leaders I admire and respect. An hour or so into our meal, one of the participants recalled a time that she was approached by a consultant asking her, “Is that smile of yours real or sarcastic?” She was taken back. Anyone who’s around Yanixa can recognize her smile as an outward sign of her inner, genuine happiness. This startling interaction caused her to be introspective about her happiness. The best she could tell, it’s been a conscious effort for her to choose happiness as a way of life.

The universe is a timely and effective teacher. After our dinner was complete, I returned to my hotel room and picked up the book I was reading -- Spiritual Liberation by Michael Bernard Beckwith. Moments later, I came across these words: "Happiness cannot be forced upon us nor can we force it upon others. Each individual must give his or her consent to being happy.” There’s some truth. A common myth is that happiness (or lack thereof) is a result of our circumstances or the behaviors and actions of others. It’s easy to think that way because it takes no skill—seems to occur naturally.

Reading those words in the book on the heels of my dinner conversation, told me I was intended to ponder this concept of happiness. Since I’m in the learning and development business, I quickly concluded that those who are interested in, and take part in, self-development must be happier than their counterparts. Was this my ego speaking, or was this a factual, non-biased truth? In reality, not all my clients are happy. What might this tell me? Where does one find true happiness?

While continuing to read Beckwith’s book I uncovered something that made sense to me. He describes the difference between improvement, change and transformation. Here’s how he puts it:

• “Improvement indicates that something has upleveled itself,” such as a new and improved product. “Improvement is always subject to fluctuation…Perhaps something positive added to our lives, such as exercise, improves our blood pressure. If we were to abandon the habit of exercise, our blood pressure would return to its previous count.”
• “Change occurs when something shifts in our consciousness along with a corresponding behavior change. Stopping an addiction is change. Although if we regress in consciousness, old patterns may reassert themselves.” Change, like improvement, is not permanent because it sprouts from human will.
• “Transformation is limitless since it stems from an evolving discovery and expression of the Authentic Self.” With transformation, there’s no “going back” because it’s “a movement of awareness away from limited thought forms into a conscious realization of our limitless nature. Transformation gets us free.”

Perhaps true and genuine happiness results from our transformation. Have you ever seen an unhappy butterfly? The caterpillar yields to the butterfly within (as the acorn yields to the oak tree within) and fulfills its earthly purpose—there’s no returning to the caterpillar state. The caterpillar didn’t complete a self-improvement program or a workshop on change management. It transformed—accomplishing its intended purpose.

The transformation process begins when we are willing to sit quietly with ourselves and gain insight. When we trust ourselves, believe in ourselves, and even love ourselves. When we’re willing to yield to the gifts, talents, and greatness that reside within each of us. This can be a challenge because it is often contrary to the lifelong teaching of lack and insufficiency to which many of us have been subjected.

Transformation is the journey to oneself. It is the passionate pursuit of becoming who you are intended to be. Simply, it is fulfilling your earthly purpose. Don’t settle for improvement or change when you are destined to transform! Be courageous and do the work necessary to live your purpose—you won’t regret it. As you travel along this journey, let the outward sign of your inner happiness be the radiant smile on your face.